Generated Title: Trump's CZ Pardon: Either He's Lying, or He's Even Dumber Than We Thought

Okay, so Trump pardoned Binance's CZ. Big freakin' deal, right? Except now he's claiming he has "no idea who he is." Seriously? Give me a break.

The Amnesia Defense

Trump's saying he doesn't know CZ, doesn't know about Binance's shady dealings, doesn't know anything. "I don't know who he is," he told CBS. He claims CZ was "treated really badly by the Biden administration," calling it a "witch hunt." This is the same guy who bitched about Biden using an "autopen" for pardons, claiming Biden didn't know what he was signing. The hypocrisy is thicker than a milkshake from McDonald's.

Let's be real, the guy is either lying through his teeth, or he's so detached from reality that he signs off on pardons without even a basic Google search. Which is worse? I honestly don't know. It's like choosing between getting punched in the face or kicked in the nuts. Both options suck.

And the timing? Impeccable, as always. Gotta distract from something, right? What skeletons are rattling around in the Trump family closet this week, I wonder?

The "Global Competitiveness" Excuse

Trump claims the pardon was about making the U.S. more competitive in crypto. "It's a huge industry," he says, "And if we're not gonna be the head of it, China, Japan, or someplace else is."

Oh, so now we're letting convicted money launderers off the hook to "win" the crypto race? That's like saying we should legalize steroids to win the Olympics. The ends don't justify the means, especially when the "means" involves potentially enabling terrorist financing and child abuse—which, let's not forget, Binance was accused of facilitating.

Binance agreed to pay $4.3 billion to settle allegations of illicit transactions. That's not exactly chump change. But hey, who cares about a few billion dollars when global dominance is on the line, right?

Seriously, does anyone actually buy this crap? Are we supposed to believe that Trump is suddenly a champion of responsible crypto innovation? This is the same guy who probably thinks Bitcoin is something you order at Chipotle.

Wait, his sons are into crypto? Okay, that actually explains a lot. Maybe this whole thing is just a convoluted way to line the family pockets. Junior and Eric probably whispered sweet nothings about "blockchain" into his ear, and suddenly CZ is a victim of the "vicious, horrible group of people in the Biden administration."

The Trump Paradox

So, Trump claims he doesn't know CZ, but also claims CZ was treated unfairly. He bashes Biden for using an autopen to issue pardons without knowing the details, but then pardons CZ without knowing who he is.

It's a paradox wrapped in an enigma, deep fried in hypocrisy.

Maybe I'm missing something. Maybe there's some grand strategic chess move happening here that's way over my head.

Nah, probably not.

What a Clown Show...

The whole thing stinks. Trump's either lying, incompetent, or both. And honestly, at this point, does it even matter? We're so used to this level of absurdity that it barely registers anymore. Just another day in the circus.